Requiem for the Separate Self
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During the time a being passes from this world, those observing the process closely can be transformed. Witnessing a soul drop all the trappings on their way to Infinity can give an embodied consciousness a really good idea of just exactly how much is released. Until that moment, the understanding about the need to let go can be purely thoughts in a mindstream of thoughts. Witnessing death though, can breathe life into the knowing, can make all the verses and all the sutras of the greatest promises of all the scriptures of all the traditions come alive in the body, in the life.
"The death of an old dream is an essential aspect of the death-rebirth journey, the dream of me and my life and the way it was all supposed to turn out. The invitation is to hold the shattered soul-pieces near and grieve all that we will inevitably lose on the path of awakening and healing."
~Matthew Licata
What dies along the Self Realization journey, or the awakening journey, or along the path to Nirvana, or whatever else it might be called, is a sense of separate self. This does not magically solve all our problems, have us walk around in only bliss, or give us special status among other human beings. It simply allows us to enter the stream of Life, unimpeded.
What would life look like if I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that the me I’ve taken myself to be, with all its dreams, identities, stories, fears, desires, etc., is only a miniscule sliver of Who I really Am? What might change about the way I live? Assuming I can rely on myself to take care of the body even in this knowing, (because Nature knows how to take care of Herself,) how might this that I Am, show up in the world?
The evolution of life on planet Earth right now, depends on our really getting this. I can think of no better way for human nodes of Consciousness to get this – to really get this, beyond the cognitive – than to sit bedside with their loved ones dying.
I welcome your responses.
Requiem for the Separate Self
Thank you, Marga. ❤️🙏
This idea of sitting at the bedside of the ones we love as they are dying has so many layers that are related to how comfortable the family members are with death and subsequently attachment to form. I have four examples to draw from.
1) My grandmother kept my grandfather home alone and piously stayed with him (in anger) as he died and wouldn’t let any of the family say goodbye or come to pay respects.
2) My father’s death - he didn’t have a concept or language for death. So many men are programmed to be providers and to be do-ing. Feeling and the ephemeral were not something to be trusted so he dug in his heels, defiant of death until he took his last breath on the bathroom floor, after years of pulmonary disease.
3) My own mother in law who I spent the last 12 days of her life with. I went to the nursing home every day - singing to her and chanting and praying, rubbing her with essential oils and helping her to ease her grip on her physical attachment that kept her soul pinned to this earth. Deep into this process one of her sons, in denial of death, demanded she get up. He took her to another facility, he couldn’t tell that the veil had already parted and she was walking through. She died 24 hours later of a heart attack alone in a room without any family there.
4) My aunt Janie, my namesake whose 7 children and their children all gathered around her bed, candles lit, reading children’s stories, singing family tunes with guitars, love and golden light filling the air as she breathed her last breath.
That’s how I want to go- community, fullness, golden light.
Did I answer your question? I’m not sure. Though you’ve touched on something beautiful here.
This essential conversation around death is what is needed to fill the gaps and wounds of our past relationship to death. This conversation gives us a map to understand the benefits of being with our dying loved ones. It’s a a map to understanding that death is part of the purpose and meaning, rather than what happens after all the do-ing and attachment to form.
The formless as part of the form.♥️